Becoming a foster parent is one of the most meaningful ways to support children and families during a season of crisis. But it can also come with a steep learning curve. From navigating the court system to understanding trauma-informed care and building relationships with birth families, new foster parents are often asked to take in a lot of information all at once. For relative and kinship caregivers, that transition can happen even more suddenly, leaving little time to prepare.

At KVC Missouri, we believe no foster parent should have to navigate this journey alone. Carrie Mosbey, CPA Lead at KVC Missouri, brings both professional expertise and lived experience as a former foster parent and adoptive mom. Drawing from Carrie’s insights, this list of books and resources is designed to equip foster parents at every stage with practical tools, real-life perspective and the confidence to build meaningful, healing connections with the children in their care.

Top Three Books for New Foster Parents to Read

1. The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family

Authors: Karyn B. Purvis and David R. Cross

Children in foster care have experienced trauma, and this can result in some challenging behaviors. “A lot of foster parents, and especially new foster parents, may have trouble handling those big behaviors and knowing what approach to use for those behaviors,” shares Carrie. This book offers practical advice to help foster and adoptive parents work through those difficult behaviors with a calm, gentle approach.

One concept of this book that foster parents will find especially helpful is Compassionate Discipline. In most cases, because of the trauma they’ve experienced, children in foster care need a different approach to discipline — and that’s what new foster parents will learn in this book. The book also helps new foster parents learn about Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI), a valuable evidence-based tool for treatment-level foster parents in particular.

Order a copy of The Connected Child

2. Keep the Doors Open: Lessons Learned from a Year of Foster Parenting

Author: Kristin Berry

Offering a more personal, intimate insight into the world of foster parenting, Kristin Berry shares her own experience as a foster parent and the lessons she learned along the way. Kristin provided care to more than 20 children over the course of nine years as a foster parent.

Foster parents will connect with the everyday trials, joys and heartaches of being a foster parent that Kristin shares. Her book can help new foster parents recognize how challenging behaviors are rooted in trauma, abuse and neglect, giving children in foster care more patience and compassion. She also shares candidly about how to emotionally prepare yourself for heartaches that can come with foster care.

Order a copy of Keep the Doors Open

3. First Time Fostering: A Practical Guide for Supporting Kids in Foster Care

Author: Laura the Foster Parent Partner

This book, written by a popular foster parenting expert, provides practical, in-the-moment guidance for foster parents. Carrie wishes she’d had this ultimate guide when she was fostering!

Throughout the book, Laura covers all aspects of foster parenting, from working with case workers and families to trauma-informed parenting to navigating the court system. It’s a great catch-all resource for anyone considering foster care or actively providing foster care!

Order a copy of First Time Fostering

Free KVC Resources for Foster Parents

KVC’s Textured Hair Care Guide

One quarter of children in foster care in the United States are of Black or African American heritage. With this ethnicity comes hair and skincare that are different than that of the predominantly white families who often provide care.

Carrie experienced this challenge firsthand when she fostered her now-adopted son. She had the challenge of learning to care for hair and skin that was very different from her own. To this day, Carrie refers to this guide for her son.

This comprehensive guide covers everything from protective hairstyles to the best products for textured hair, helping foster parents to navigate this new arena in a way that supports the health and happiness of children in their care!

Download KVC’s FREE Guide: Textured Hair Care Guide

Becoming a Treatment-Level Foster Parent: What You Need to Know

Treatment-level foster parents provide care for the highest-need children in the foster care system. Becoming a treatment-level foster parent is both a challenge and a calling. These youth have faced incredible hardships, often feeling like stability is out of reach.

If you are considering becoming a treatment-level foster parent, this resource guides you through the process, the training and what to expect.

Download KVC’s FREE Guide: Becoming a Treatment-Level Foster Parent

Treatment Foster Care: Five Powerful Stories of Love, Hope and Healing

Hearing the stories of others is important for equipping yourself before becoming a foster parent, especially at the treatment level. Whether you’re a first-time foster parent or are considering treatment-level foster care, these five stories from real treatment-level foster parents will give you an inside look at what it’s really like, showing the impact a treatment-level foster parent can have and how they’ve navigated different challenges. 

Download KVC’s FREE E-Book: Treatment Foster Care Stories

Additional Resources

Beyond books, there are many resources available to help new foster parents! Explore these bonus resources.

“ReMoved” Short Film

This emotional short film tells the story of a young girl and her baby brother entering the foster care system. It shows how the two are separated and the behavioral challenges the young girl faces as she misses her brother and deals with the trauma she went through, going from one home to the next with only a trash bag of belongings to take with her.

Watch the Short Film: ReMoved

“The Call to Foster” Podcast

The Missouri Department of Social Services created this podcast for anyone considering becoming a foster parent. The podcast hosts interview real foster parents in our state and share resources for anyone considering becoming a foster parent in Missouri.

Listen to The Call to Foster Podcast

KVC Missouri Caregivers Facebook Group

It takes a village to raise a child — and foster care is no different! Facebook groups are a great way to connect with other foster parents and get advice, support and encouragement throughout your foster care journey.

Join the KVC Missouri Caregivers Facebook Group for Foster Parents

The Impact of a Willing Heart

Providing foster care can be challenging. You may not always feel prepared, and that can be scary to think about if you’re just considering becoming a foster parent. You don’t need to have all the answers or feel like the best caregiver in the world to foster. The most important requirement is a willing heart!

KVC Missouri is here to support foster parents around the state through resources, trauma-informed mental health professionals, compassionate case managers and more.

If you’re considering becoming a foster parent in Missouri, get more information here.